All F-Ups Aren’t Created Equal

I got off from work, came home, and started to get ready to meet with my trainer today. I had all this energy that came out of nowhere, so I was pumped for this workout. Right before I got ready to leave, my friend sent me this article about SheaMoisture taking a huge L. I didn’t get a glance, nor did I want to read it because no SheaMoisture slander will be tolerated. I decided to do my research a bit further and check good old Twitter only to find my partner of 8 years had violated our marriage in a major way. 

Let me explain.

For those of us who became apart of the Natural Hair Movement in 2009, we knew the struggle of trying to find the right products that would take care of our newly discovered kinks and curls. In the dark ages, there were only 1 or 2 shelves for black hair care in your local drugstore. When I started, SheaMoisture only had four products in its line in our neighborhood, but I stuck it out. I dedicated my twist out to the struggle, especially since the Curl Enhancing Smoothie, the Holy Grail of moisturizers, was moisturizing my situation and preserving my edges. 

Years later we have #AMillionWaysToShea and we #BreakTheWalls of beauty isles (personally I appreciate the ethnic section, I like knowing where I need to go for what I need). You can definitely say I am committed. So today after seeing this ad about Hair Hate I was confused, dare I say it, hurt! The Hair Hate for Becky, Rose, and Tomi definitely did not resonate with me and the Hair Hate I had because of forced assimilation, job discrimination, and internal self hatred brought on by societal standards that basically said black is wack. I felt betrayed because I knew what SheaMoisture and I had for almost a decade was real. It is real. 

I also felt betrayed because the commercial left out one of SheaMoisture’s major contributors:


We have shown up, showed out, done tutorials, reviewed products, and most importantly used our trillion dollar buying power to help fund this black owned business. This is why I believe all F-Ups aren’t created equal. 

I can’t believe I am about to say this, but Tariq Nasheed has a point (pass me the moonshine). This one time dear God I somewhat, kinda sorta, possibly, might agree with him (barf).

When the young lady was abused in that beauty store, did we pull out in droves to boycott every Asian beauty supply store? We have experienced being followed around, over charged, and insulted in these stores, yet we still go back. We are still funding these businesses.

We’re also still using Uber, drinking Pepsi, and wearing extremely expensive name brand clothing lines that do absolutely nothing for our community, even after some of them have made outright racist statements, yet, they are given the benefit of the doubt.

However, we are not as forgiving when it comes to black owned businesses. We expect perfection when we don’t expect the same from non-BOBs. We will quickly say “This is why I don’t support black businesses now” after getting the same experience at a major chain. We will complain about customer service at BOBs while we run back to some of the same businesses we say suck i.e. McDonald’s and Walmart. We tend to be so unforgiving when it comes to our own people and sometimes, I feel like we perpetuate the same old rhetoric of black anything isn’t good enough. So when SheaMoisture released their official apology, they were damned if they did or didn’t. They’ve been trending for God knows how long because of today’s F-Up and of course, we weren’t as forgiving.

I really hope SheaMoisture can get God or Olivia Pope on the phone. I hope the brand will be able to recover and remember its core supporters who have the ability to make things popular before majority culture hops on the bandwagon. David Banner made a point in his Breakfast Club interview by saying we don’t have to go searching to be accepted when we drive culture. We don’t have to sacrifice our Blackness to be accepted by someone else’s beauty standards when we are the standard. It’s time we act like it.


The CEO of SheaMoisture has released an apology as well. I’m fine with his apology knowing nothing the company releases will be good enough for the masses. They will definitely take a hit financially, but I also want to point out that on April 5th, SheaMoisture released an ad showing different black women of different shades and hair textures. I wonder why this went overlooked. Does this change your opinion?


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